This week, Karl Kaputski shares how he learned to play big and overcome the pain of trauma and the resulting addictions.
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Although there are approximately 46 destructive addictions that are sitting time bombs out there today, the ones I am focusing on in this article have to do with the symptoms of being a sexual abuse and injustice survivor. How do we get past these horrific experiences and live a happy productive life? I considered in the past my actions, thoughts and behavior, addictions to the way I wanted to feel. I kept doing certain things the same way because I knew the predictable results would occur. Those results could be destructive long term but for the moment they would feel so right. If you could somehow imagine an alcoholic or drug addict, for example. Both of them need a certain fix to make them feel good for the moment. However, the destruction that follows physically, emotionally, mentally can be severe. A smart phone can turn into another addiction you might be able to relate to. How many people cannot go anywhere without it. People, especially children, on average spend more than 9 hours a day online. It's all based on the stimulation that they are receiving from it. When we get overstimulated our brains produce a chemical in our brain called dopamine. It's a chemical that carries information between neurons. It enables us not only to see rewards but to take action to move toward them. Basically a feel good sensation. Just like any addiction, the more you do it, the greater the desire for more to get that same high, feeling or sensation. So in essence, pertaining to the struggles that a sexual abuse, injustice survivor suffers through, our reactions to that tragic event are ones of addictions that create a feel good sensation for the moment. Destructive to all in the long term but a quick fix in the short. Initially, we all go through the shock of the event and want to relive it over and over. Yet, soon enough we find out we want to move past it as soon as possible. It's the moment of feeling sorry for ourselves, the thoughts that we can't move on, the insecurity we feel, that give us those moments of that feel good inside of our brains. Which, I know sounds crazy ! Stimulation can be good or bad. It's understanding how our brains work that becomes one of the first steps in healing. We become aware of what is taking place and why we act a certain way. Did you know the human attention span 15 years ago was 12 seconds. Now it's down to 8 seconds. A gold fish's attention is 9. Amazingly ridiculous! As download speeds have increased on how we receive information over the internet, the lower our patience has become in everything. Anxiety levels increase quicker. Stress takes hold and poor decisions become the norm because of the fog in our brains.
So now I might be flooding your brain with too much information on why you feel a certain way and why suffering is so longing and painful. We choose it because it's less work then beating the problem itself. I've lived it just like most of you out there. I have witnessed others that have overcome similar stories like you and I. Success is out there waiting for you.
I am not going to beat around the bush on this problem any longer. You might not like it but here goes. You can change your life in less than thirty days forever. I did! In fact, twenty one to be precise. You can take those negative addictions...and change them to positive actions (addictions) in days, not years.
We all know the shortest distance from point A to point B is a straight line. We all know our attention span is very short also. And I believe we would all rather spend as little amount of time as possible solving a problem rather than that slow burdensome process we put ourselves through because everybody tells us it's going to take time. That is such a lie! Who wants to torture themselves that long! Where did that lie get started from? Was it the turtle who ran the race against the rabbit? I got news for you. No matter how many times the turtle races the rabbit, it is going to lose. Fact of life! Slow and steady will not win the race. Speed does! Maybe you have been surrounded all your life with turtles telling you be patient, take it easy, time will make you feel better. Guess what? You are the only one that can make you feel better. You are made for so much more! There is only so much time in your life. Every second you are not being happy means you are not fulfilling what you were put on this earth to be, the very best version of what you can be.
We are designed to run our lives in sprints. About ninety days to be precise. After that we tend to want to move on to something else. It's just the way human nature is built. We are made to win. I say it again....You are made for more! Imagine if you had the power to accelerate your success. Imagine if you had the tools to make your dreams reality. Imagine what it would be like to smile, laugh, have total control over your emotions, relationships, your future? If you believe that slow and steady wins the race..you've been told a lie! It's time to break the addiction!
If you were my student, the first thing I would do is to teach. You were probably always taught to set realistic goals. What a bunch of garbage! It must have been a turtle who said that! Who cares about doing something normal. I succeeded in life because I set unrealistic goals, convince myself that I could achieve them and then did it. You can too! As you sit in class gathering up all that is being taught, I will ask you if you understand. . You lie to me and say yes. How can you yet...you haven't walk the talk.
The next thing I would do is demonstrate. We would go over a walk through of how we do things....like a watch and learn. You would tell me again you understand...another lie!
It's now your turn to do! You start the process, you stumble, get back up, try again. You have no idea what you're doing. You have been lying to yourself but you have hope. Every time you try, you do one thing better than the previous time. At this point you realize you really didn't understand what you were doing. But in a short period of time, things start to get easier for you and you somehow shock yourself and accomplish the things that prior you would have thought was impossible. And in three weeks!
The only difference between you and every one else who has gotten frustrated in the past and given up...You understand that you had to become successful. You understand your weaknesses and put systems into place. You have learned how to be focused on one thing for the next 21 days.
The formula to overcoming any addiction you are suffering from has certain principles that you will learn to understand. I want to leave you with some thoughts that have been invaluable to me and I believe will help you take the next step toward your recovery.
When it comes to accomplishing your dream, you don't have to do it all at once. Do what you can today and forget tomorrow. Tomorrow will worry about itself.
The thing that you thought was hard eventually becomes easy on the other side of implementation.
Once you decide to stick with something, the results will show up.You just need to hang around long enough to get them.
I believe in each and everyone of you. I suffered just like you but no more. There is something great inside of you. I know it. You need to start believing it too! Your dream is right around the corner. get ready...here it comes!
Until next time!
Karl
Stay tuned next time for the 21 day process that changed my life. Learn about the 1-3 day challenge, 4-7 urge, 8 day pendulum turn and day 14 momentum finish.
Read Part 4: Removing Your Ghost and Becoming Larger than Life!
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Best I can tell I would classify myself as an entrepreneur. A seven times business owner, #1 best selling author, international keynote speaker and by the way, and injustice survivor. Working as a peak performance consultant in many different aspects in the business and personal world for 30 plus years, I have had the experience to delve into 54 different industries with individuals in all sorts of professions to help create within them a peak performance culture. Did you know that you can create predictable and profitable results in all five facets of your life? It's all about your emotional, mental, physical, financial and spiritual well being that are intertwined and affect how happy and successful you are going to be.
https://www.success1concepts.com/
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