"Any sign of weakness or vulnerability is unthinkable. If others discover we are weak, they will have power over us and this knowledge will be used against us." ~from Shelter from the Storm
Finally, we need to understand, I mean really understand, that there is always a risk involved in everything we do and in every relationship. But, without risk, there is no reward. Check out this additional definition of vulnerability in the context of a bridge game:
“liable to increased penalties but entitled to increased bonuses after winning a game in contract bridge” ~Merriam-Webster Dictionary
I encourage you to pick out an area of life where you are over-controlling. What would it be like to give up some control and instead embrace vulnerability? What steps would you need to take to let down your drawbridge?
For an additional perspective on vulnerability, watch “The Power of Vulnerability.”
- How have you avoided being vulnerable and instead used control to gain a sense of safety and security in your relationships? (Example: I always want to decide what we are going to do and when.)
- What is the impact on you or others as a result of avoiding vulnerability and instead trying to control? (Example: There is tension, distrust, and a lack of connection.)
- What choices have you been making, risks have you been taking that reinforce your false beliefs about vulnerability?